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Last month I decided to start over and work through my perfectionism one step at a time through Anxiety BC. Currently known as Anxiety Canada, this nonprofit aims to help people of all ages overcome their anxiety and create happier lives for themselves. Using a free pdf created to educate and help those with perfectionism I will set a weekly goal following their advice and research, and hopefully I will gain healthier control over my mental health.
Though not the most poetic quote, this is the advice I tell others, and the advice I live by. As of today (Wednesday 16, 2019) I will follow the steps they provide and post weekly updates every Wednesday. So, let’s begin.
Step #1: Realistic Thinking
According to Anxiety BC the first step is to change my mindset towards my behavior and my standards. I need to think in positive terms that are not critical, or sarcastic, and helpful to accomplishing my goals. I’ve been practicing being more realistic with myself since I first read the article, and my goals have indeed become less broad and overwhelming. I have a lot of responsibilities, but I know not to overload myself and to stop trying to do one million things at once.
For example, yesterday I felt anxious because I received my syllabi and realized the amount of work I need to put into my classes to get straight As. I was purchasing textbooks are realized how costly they are, while researching proper materials to care for succulents in the winter; it was also my birthday. I napped on my desk for a half hour, and munched on baby carrots to sooth my grinding teeth. The month-long vacation was wondrous, and the concept of becoming stressed in the coming days made me stressed, I felt the weight of all of my future responsibilities at once. I took many deep breaths and wrote out on my whiteboard what tasks I felt I needed to complete first - which was all of them. I then took quite a few more deep breaths and wrote what I absolutely, positively had to get done by today (Wednesday), and finally I was able to breath properly. I went to dinner with my best friend and yoga with my squirrel sister. All the tasks I wanted to get done ASAP, I pushed to different days. Changing the ways I describe the necessity of activities has helped me create realistic goals.
For today I will focus on positive, realistic thinking and motivate myself to take things one step at a time and not worry too much about the overall outcome. For example, my goal is not to earn straight As, but rather to learn the material the best I can and maintain my current GPA. If I get straight As, yay, if not my world will not crumble and no one will be disappointed in me, including, myself.
~The best way to start a habit is to start it the day you decide which habit to start
Tool #1: Changing Perfectionist Thinking
Step #1: Realistic Thinking
According to Anxiety BC the first step is to change my mindset towards my behavior and my standards. I need to think in positive terms that are not critical, or sarcastic, and helpful to accomplishing my goals. I’ve been practicing being more realistic with myself since I first read the article, and my goals have indeed become less broad and overwhelming. I have a lot of responsibilities, but I know not to overload myself and to stop trying to do one million things at once.
For example, yesterday I felt anxious because I received my syllabi and realized the amount of work I need to put into my classes to get straight As. I was purchasing textbooks are realized how costly they are, while researching proper materials to care for succulents in the winter; it was also my birthday. I napped on my desk for a half hour, and munched on baby carrots to sooth my grinding teeth. The month-long vacation was wondrous, and the concept of becoming stressed in the coming days made me stressed, I felt the weight of all of my future responsibilities at once. I took many deep breaths and wrote out on my whiteboard what tasks I felt I needed to complete first - which was all of them. I then took quite a few more deep breaths and wrote what I absolutely, positively had to get done by today (Wednesday), and finally I was able to breath properly. I went to dinner with my best friend and yoga with my squirrel sister. All the tasks I wanted to get done ASAP, I pushed to different days. Changing the ways I describe the necessity of activities has helped me create realistic goals.
For today I will focus on positive, realistic thinking and motivate myself to take things one step at a time and not worry too much about the overall outcome. For example, my goal is not to earn straight As, but rather to learn the material the best I can and maintain my current GPA. If I get straight As, yay, if not my world will not crumble and no one will be disappointed in me, including, myself.
I hope you’ve enjoyed reading my thought processes and my struggle with setting far too high expectations for myself. Maybe you can see a bit of yourself in me. Next week, I’ll update you on my progression, so see you next time!
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